Mom died on 27 August 2011.
After the chemotherapy was abandoned in July, Mom had a course of radiotherapy to treat a tumour on her spine and underwent pleurodesis to stop her drowning in fluid around her lungs. To those of us who helped Mom every day, we knew that the tingling in her legs wasn't a good sign, and the tumours in her lungs were producing so much fluid that Mom's right lung was squashed in her chest. These two interventions made Mom comfortable and pain-free. We talked about dying and Mom decided to die at home.
The wonderful community health team provided a profile bed, commode, and daily personal care. They implemented a plan for making sure that Mom had a dignified death in the community with a do not resuscitate order preventing any last minute heroic interventions by paramedics.
Mom stopped eating on the Friday and was semi-conscious on Saturday. The Community Nurse took us through the Liverpool Care Pathway, a model for end-of-life care. I took the dogs to her to say goodbye and then Dad stayed with her. She just took a last breath and that was that.