I belong to a gym. I swim regularly. I walk two Boxer dogs every day and I am an active, happy person. Last year was difficult, not just because Mom was ill but also because my level of fitness plummeted, along with my weight. For several months of 2011, I managed to go swimming just once a week, although I never missed a dog walk, sometimes having to walk in the dark. No, the dogs didn't enjoy it either. My health suffered as a result of the sleep deprivation and the stress of caring for Mom and supporting Dad. By the time Mom died, I could hardly walk. I dragged myself around, easing the pain with ibuprofen. I needed to heal myself.
At the beginning of the year, as I was rummaging around in New Year's Resolutions, I considered taking on a personal trainer to help get me back to full fitness. I talked to two lady trainers who seemed very nice but one talked too much and one actually wanted a running companion - not for me. And the chap at the Club seemed a bit too fanatical. I mean, he enforces omitting food groups, his people are tired and no-one seems to be losing weight. And I've recently heard the term 'pseudo-science' - quite. The one thing they all seemed to have in common is a 'one size fits all' approach to personal training. I think that's wrong.
Now, I'm certain that not all personal trainers are like this. Many probably have fantastic people skills, but as long as the sessions only concentrate on exercise and diet, success will be limited. The psyche of the person seeking help from a personal trainer suggests someone who needs to share, otherwise why not just go for a run or a swim on your own?
I have worked hard on my own to improve my fitness. I have been so tired some nights that my husband thought I was ill, but when your resources are so low, exercise takes a lot out of you. I am a spiritual person, practicing yoga, meditation and breath awareness daily. Grief is stressful. Stress affects your physical body too. Take care of your body, as well as your mind. You can't be one without the other.
Which is why I was surprised and concerned when I overheard a conversation about 'grief anger' being treated with homeopathy. It's a good term, but is it treatable with homeopathy? Is it realistic to expect a more rapid return to 'normal' life after bereavement with the help of homeopathy, or other complementary therapies? I agree that these therapies are helpful, but there is so much more to it. In my opinion, it's best to talk to someone about your grief. Use complementary therapies to support you while you are undergoing counselling. They can help you sleep better, eat properly and interact positively with others. But, only by sharing with other human beings can you truly be healed*.
*For anyone looking for more online inspiration, have a look at these grief blogs. Please let me know your experiences of dealing with grief, and moving on through whatever means.
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