Dear Friend (sharing grief)

Dear Friend,

I am so sorry to hear that your dear Dad has passed away. I know your pain. The sadness. The overwhelming emotion of dealing with the death of a loved one.

Your Dad's death has brought back memories of my own mother's death, not quite two years ago. The grief still residing just under my skin, waiting for a wound through which to surface.

I understand now the feelings of grief. I recognise the melancholy. I don't stop myself from weeping at the thought of who I have lost.

And neither should you. Cry, remonstrate. Talk. Tell us how you are feeling. Laugh. Remember.

Be strong for your family.

I wrap my heart around you.

❤

Perfect peony, May 2013

I'm linking up this post with Older Mum (In A Muddle) for #One Week - Spring '13. Delighted to be joining in again.

Photography by Lesley Beeton

It's not a Blue Monday here

No way. I just don't believe it. Perhaps it's because I've not only booked our holiday but also because we're not waiting until the Summer - we go in a few weeks!

Yippee, and why not? After the year we've had, we deserve it, the whole bang-shoot. My OH was amazing throughout Mom's illness. Although he's only a Cardiologist, he helped us pull together all the specialists we needed to keep Mom out of hospital and well looked after at home. He suffered too. He cried when we got Mom's diagnosis, mostly because he knew what we would go through. And he was right in all respects. It was quite a roller-coaster.

I'm pleased though to repay him for his support by making all the arrangements, sorting out who will take care of the dogs, and Dad. And that just leaves me to take care of him, after twenty years together, still a beautiful friendship.

Gerbera, Lesley Beeton

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Chatting is life...isn't it?

The lone male swimmer made a snide remark this morning. I don't think he was being mean but he could have kept his mouth shut. I was the last lady out of the pool, leaving just him thrashing about in his own space. I smiled and said how lucky he was to have the pool to himself, no kids no ladies and he replied NO CHATTING!

Now I know we do talk a lot, but we've got a lot to say. And there are six of us with busy lives and families, and none of us is a shrinking violet, either. So there is plenty of competition for 'air time'.

His comment got me thinking about how the past year would have been without these wonderful ladies to share Mom's illness with. I'm quite sure that I wouldn't have coped with it as well as I have if I hadn't been able to escape to the pool and have a bit of a chat. Perhaps that's why Dad is finding it a bit difficult, he hasn't got anyone to just chat to, it isn't a man-thing to chat without purpose or inhibitions. Well, it comes naturally to me.

I had a second reminder of the importance of telling people how you feel. I was thrilled to received a phone call from a friend in South Africa. She has been reading this blog and felt closer to us because of it. I am most encouraged by this, and by almost 500 of you who have read this blog this month! Thank you. 
But please remember that blogging, as with chatting, is a two-way communication, so please leave your comments and feedback. And follow the blog, or Twitter for updates.

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All I want for Christmas...

I've got a list. I've checked it twice. Actually, I've checked that it's all been bought too. But there is something not on the list. Something I couldn't write down. Something in my heart.
All I want for Christmas is a day of happy memories, and looking forward to the New Year. A year of good health, new adventures and lots of love.
Oh, and friendship. More of the wonderful friendship I have enjoyed this year. In spite of everything, something beautiful flourished this year. A warm and enduring friendship that will last a lifetime. Priceless. Can't put that on a Christmas list. 
What's on your list in your heart?

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