Of wombles and weirdos

I hate litter. Why must a beautiful spot be blighted by pie wrappers, condoms and wet wipes?

Two years ago Mr B, repulsed by me picking up litter, bought me a litter tool - as a Valentines Day gift! Who says love wanes after 20 years of marriage? It is the best gift he has ever bought me. I pick litter most days. Sadly, the woods and the car parks are used by the detritus of humanity. I can only imagine what goes on there after dark. Weirdos.

And it isn't right that children, old ladies, mum's, dad's and dog walkers should walk through the muck. So I clean it up, bag it up, take it home and throw it away.

The Countryside Ranger is aware of the problem but says there is no budget for any action on her part. There used to be a bin in the car park, but someone set it alight a few years ago. It was never emptied anyway.

When I see evidence of cannabis I tell the Police Community Support Officer. When I see flytipping, I tell the Council. When I see garden waste dumped there, I tell the Ranger. More often than not, if it fits in my car, I don't tell anyone. Just pick it up and take it home. Last week, I recycled more than 20 plastic plant pots at Squires Garden Centre. Job done.

There are builders at work in the road, and there is a constant pile of coffee cups and sandwich wrappers in the ditch. A neighbour saw me, with my litter tool and wooly hat, in the ditch, picking up litter. 'What a good idea' she said. I smiled. If only, more people were truly irritated by litter, the countryside would be a much nicer place. Or perhaps we need a womble or two....

New blog posts at Surrey Life and talkhealth.

Village blight

And I'm not talking about potatoes!

There is a scummy underbelly lurking around the village, but no one will take responsibility for it. On the surface, the big houses, the long drives and the manicured gardens make it the perfect place to live. But unlike me, many of our neighbours never set foot outside their properties to see what really goes on. They zoom off in their fancy cars, to return after dark, totally unaware of the daily grind and grime.

My office faces the lane, so I see it all. Between 8.45 and 9.15am, and again between 3 and 4pm, it becomes a race track. Keep your pets indoors, don't walk in the lane, and certainly don't try to turn right. For the School Mums Cometh. At some speed, in rather large cars. Stand back against the hedge, get out of the way. 

And woe betide you if your delivery arrives at those times, and holds up the torrent for a few minutes. 

So, provided you don't want to leave your home at school dropping off and picking up times, walking in the village is a pleasure, isn't it? Well, no. You have to avoid the dog poo, the litter, the dodgy man with step ladders on his roof, the hugely busy road to the A3 which bisects the village.

OK, so we know the risks, let's just get on with it. Mind the potholes, there's another one. Whoops, that cyclist will have a nasty bump on his head.

Beware the 'stalker cat' (thanks to BB for the phrase), get the Boxer dogs in the car. Drive to the woods. Don't look at the strange chap in his car, or the odd one boxing the trees. Step over the used condoms and little bags of discarded cannabis. Avoid the 'dingly dell' where the grown men meet.

Phew, it's a gorgeous day. The sun is shining. The dogs are enjoying their sniff around. But, what's that? NO, LEAVE IT! Who would leave a pile of vomit in the woods? The mind boggles.

Step over more dog poo, don't get annoyed by the bulging poo bags hanging in the trees. Remember to bring more bin bags with you next time.

Now, what's this? A ginormous pile of broken glass, wood, nails, broken buckets - an old garden shed perhaps? Dumped in the woods, blocking the footpath and bridleway. Eight days for the council to clear it, because 'it isn't a big problem' in our area. Well, I beg to differ. It's the third time in 6 months.

Look, it's not rocket science. It's not law-abiding citizens flytipping, dogging and doing dope. It's the bad breath of society, which has found its way to this quiet spot in Surrey, and seems intent on making its home here.

Well, not on my turf. And next time I see you, you'll have the Boxer dogs to deal with.

A Boxer a day

How could I not have thought of this before? Of course a Boxer a day keeps the doctor away. I suspect, though, it's not just Boxers, but all dogs. Dogs are wonderful creatures, capable of giving so much to humans, even horrid humans. I have told you before about how the big big dog saved my life after a traumatic burglary. I feel so much love for the little big dog, with all his problems. He really does bring out the best in me. They demand 'down time' during the day. They let me know when I've been at the computer for too long. They really know how to play. They depend on me, and I have to think about their well being as well as my own. And they have two long walks a day, sometimes a run in the morning when the husbandly-one has time before work. The evening walks have become my favourite time of day. The weather is usually calm, the wild life tired from a busy day, the Boxers eager to explore. 

A burnt-out motor bike
also burnt the notice board

Discarded rubbish in the woods

We know our regular two mile route, right down to the irregular tree roots across the path. I guess that's why we get a bit annoyed when the litterbugs have been to visit. They leave their tissues, sweet wrappers and crisp packets strewn along the path. And that's just the stuff I can mention. My husband is horrified at the discarded items I pick up. If it's small enough to go in a carrier bag, I'll pick it up. 


The Ranger has been working in the woods again. It can't be the same person I worked with earlier in the year, as the chain saw has been liberally applied to all sorts of trees, in what appears to be an entirely hap-hazard manner. It looks as if they have held a giant saw at waist height and slashed it from side to side. Tree stumps of my height have been left standing. It's untidy and unclear what the purpose is. I will have to write to Waverley Borough Council to find out and report back. The Boxers have not been amused. We have had to remove smaller branches from the paths, and I'm certain that the amount of litter has increased. I did a litter run yesterday and filled a Waitrose bag which I took home to dispose of. I don't mind doing this as I enjoy the amenity of the Woods. I just wish that other users would also think before they drop litter. Not that I believe the person who did this is a user of the woods. In fact, I think they hate the woods. Just as the person who burnt the lovely notice board when they set fire to a motor bike probably also hated the woods. 

Perhaps a Boxer a day should keep the litter bugs away?

Follow @Shackleford_LB